As I was tucking Suzie into bed tonight, I leaned over to kiss her goodnight. She giggled, and the buried her head in her pillow, and whispered, "too late." She was gone for the night.
Walking out of her room, I had a flashback to a thousand different things when she was younger. Now that she is heading towards double digits in age, and I think, with some things, I am "too late." I don't want to be "too late" for anything with them.
We are no longer the family with "little ones" or babies, or crawlers of toddlers or walkers, cruisers or whatever else they call the saggy bottom stage.
We are now closer, but not quite there, to "tweens" and pre-teens and middle school, and changing bodies, and lots of changing minds, and changing clothes, and "c'mon Dad, everyone will be there..."
It has happened in the blink of an eye. I realize that Suzie and Kenzo are closer to the age of driving a car than they are to being driven home from the hospital as babies, and that makes me a little bit sad.
But it also makes me all the more committed to being involved and in touch and in every part of their lives before it is "too late."
We got a letter over the other day. From "the government." For health insurance purposes.
It was actually a letter we had requested, and had been expecting. We knew what is was because it came in one of those official looking envelopes with the "for official use only, any other use is punishable by...."
In this letter, from the Social Security Administration, we were officially informed that Suzie is "disabled." Actually the letter went a little further than I would have liked.
The "Reason for Determination" paragraph read like a Gatling gun to the gut. "We find that Suzie is declared disabled because she is/has...."
Really now...Was there any reason for the piling on? Couldn't we have just stopped after the first couple of items in the list? Oh anonymous Government letter writing person/machine, you are not telling us anything we don't know, but to see it in a form that is so antiseptic, so matter-of-fact, so "documented" is a little difficult.
And as I think about it, even though the letter "documents" who Suzie is, it certainly does not "define" who she is. I have a different list than "the man." She is...
A child of God
A friend of God
The apple of her mommy and daddy's eye.
The "best sister in the whole wide world."
Great at putting puzzles together
"Kind and compassionate."
In reality, that letter doesn't change anything. She did not wake up the next morning and act any differently. She was just Suzie. Same as she was, created from the foundation of time by the loving God of the Universe.
Nothing says it's time for a Big, Big Christmas like a copy of Our Big, Big God. Just shoot me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org and I would be honored to send you (or all of your nieces or nephews, etc.) a personalized copy. Just $10.00